Past(1)

It's not bad to be alone. The thoughts along with it makes it bad.

Nung bata ako hindi naman talaga ako palakaibigan. Taong bahay. Tutok sa aral. Spoiled sa lahat ng bagay sa loob lang ng bahay. Hindi ko alam pakiramdam ng may kalaro o kaibigan. I have one friend. My neighbor. pero alam ko hindi siya interesado na maging kaibigan ko. Well feeling's mutual. I only come over when both our moms are going out. No choice kasi walang mag-aalaga sakin so I had to come over even if I hate her for breaking my toys. Some friend diba haha. Kaibigan ko rin mga pinsan ko na misan pinapalusot pa ako sa bintana para lang makalabas at makalaro. Pero nahuli ako. Pinagbabawalan na ako lumabas. I hate how my family treats them before. Kahit pinsan ko na sila. Pinsan namin, pamangkin ganun tingin nila. Squatters. I am very disappointed pero ano ba magagawa ng bata diba?

And so the cycle goes. Wake up. Aral. Laro. Tulog. I'm the type of kid that would be happy already with toys. I'm weird. I had to ace all grades pag hindi isa isang mawawala mga laruan ko. Takot ko na lang hahaha.

I go to an exclusive school. A Girl's School. I've seen all kinds of crap and drama. I think everything is bsht. At dahil ka school ko sila ate, lagi akong naghihintay sa labas ng classroom nila hanggang matapos. Nung Prep ako 7am-12nn class ko. Nung nag elem na ako 7am-3pm na ako at mga kapatid ko mga 5 pa uwi. So I had to wait 2 more hours. Tawag sakin weird sa school kasi habang naghihintay sila ate lagi akong umaakyat sa ibang floors at naglalakad lakad kahit Off Limits pinupuntahan ko. Nung wala na yung isang ate ko sa school (Graduate) I'm stuck with my sister and her Practicing hours of PEP. Hanggang 7pm. Can you just imagine hanggang ilang oras oras ako naghihintay and nowehere to go haha. Pero gusto ko rin nanunuod ng practice ni ate. Minsan gusto ko rin maging PEP tulad ng ate ko. But I'm not into cheering and skirts. I'm more into dancing and sports. I kept it that way. Hanggang mag graduate na rin si ate Grade 5 ako, mag-isa na akong pumasok sa school. Hatid ni mom at sundo. Pero busy si Mommy at di ko alam kung pano mag commute so wala ako choice kundi maghintay. Minsan 5-7 ako nasusundo kasi alam ko busy siya. I have one friend nakilala ko lang siya at naging ka-close kasi late ako nasusundo, ganun rin siya. Ka-batch ko siya. Since nun hindi na ako mag-isa sa classroom, kumakain. Bumababa na ako kasabay sila sa Canteen only to know na binabackstab nila ako. I'm weird daw and everything. I didn't care. Hinayaan ko na lang hindi kasi ako marunong makipag-away at nakakahiya lang harapin pa sila kung alam mo ganung tingin nila sayo.

Days passed then I met my first crush. You can say 'First Love' I think Hahaha. Yung seatmate ko nung grade 5. Sobrang bait niya sakin, inaasar niya ako, nagpapalitan kami ng answers pag quiz yung ganung tipong kasama. Parehas kaming mahilig sa kanta. Hindi ko alam na gusto ko pa siya nun pero nalaman ko lang nung ginawan niya ako CD na may mga paborito niyang kanta. I like her. Lagi ko siyang kasama pag wala siyang kasama. Medyo hindi ako makapaniwala kasi sobrang popular niya tapos ako wala lang. I watch her practice for Jr. Pep hanggang 5 and watch her leave the school at 5:30-6. Hindi ko alam na napapansin pala ako ng mga kaibigan niya. Hanggang inaasar ako kay Meira ng paulit ulit. Her friends think I'm weird. At kumalat ang balita na gusto ko siya. Since Exclusive school kami at bawal magkagusto sa kapwa babae, pinaghiwalay agad kami sa classroom. Tahimik na ulit ako at hindi na kami nag usap since nun. I survived Grade 5

Grade 6 came normal hanggang malapit na mag graduate. Pag pauwi madadaanan ko classroom nila Meira at dadaan sa ramp. After school, lagi sila tumatambay sa bandang ramp. No choice, dun ako dadaan. hanggang isang uwian pagdaan ko hinug ako ni meira at ako nahiya bigla sabi niya namiss niya ako sabi ko namiss ko rin siya. Umalis ako ng namumula at habang pababa ng ramp narinig ko yung "nagawa ko na" ni Meira. They we're playing Truth or Dare. Dare lang pala yun. I felt slightly heart broken. First time hahaha.
Nung grad na, natapos na lahat at bago umuwi. Hinug niya ulit ako sabi ko dare nanaman ba 'to kasi hindi nakakatawa. Sinabi niya hindi at aalis na siya papuntang States, hindi ako naniwala pero nagpasalamat na lang ako. And she really left. 1st Year.. Hindi ko na siya nakita pa.

1st year was normal. Very normal it was boring.
1st year summer changed everything..

Goodbye iDate, thanks for the memories.. :)

Oh those days😍😂😤😌😔😞😖😭

Ngayon pa lang naprocess ng brain ko na wala na talaga ang idate HAHAHAHA. Perhaps we were too busy with school work, being with friends, family, loved ones or anyone else. Too busy with reality. 😔 It’s just sad na wala na talaga yung game. HA HA.

Naaalala ko pa lahat. Pilot days. I was paid to pilot an acct at halos pag uwi ko ng bahay (really late) open lang ako ng pc, log in sa iDate, tambay sa lobby kulitan sa ibang players na parang mga halimaw na wala atang balak matulog. 😂😂😂 Pero summer talaga ako mas naglaro. And nung natapos na ako sa pagpilot. Syempre gagastusin ko sweldo ko HAHAHAHA. Couldn’t help it where else would I use it? Eh parang naaadik na ako sa iDate. So I finally made an acct magssummer the next year. Unfortunately, my 1^st acct was a girl HAHAHAHA. Umaga ako nakakalaro kaya wala pa yung mga kakilala ko kasi gabi sila ol. Sa isang araw, sa damirami ng servers at channels at rooms sa game, I was at the perfect place at the perfect time (well my character was hindi pala ako HAHAHAHA) I met my mom and she became my girl <3

I can never be thankful enough for that game. At the same time medyo sad and confused pa rin why’d they have to close it. Hindi na ba talaga massave yung game? Hindi ba talaga magagawan ng paraan like siguro ibenta na lang ganun hahaha. I just noticed that they gave more effort in making Love Beat work out. I mean Love Beat is also an amazing game pero wouldn’t it be better kung may dalawang astig na laro? Hahahajk. Pero syempre hanggang isip ko lang yun alam ko mahirap din siguro sa part nila magfail at mapilitang ishutdown ang iDate. Dapat lang! hahajk.

Yung paglalaro ko, halos mag iisang taon at kalahati lang and it’s kind of disappointing for me already. Pano pa kaya yung mga hardcore idaters diba haha? Yung halos lahat ng oras na kaya nila at baon o sweldo ginamit dun. Yung mga may nabuong pagsasama dun (like me) love, friendship kasama na hate XD Yung may mga clan na binuo at yung may sariling mga tambayan sa kanya kanyang channel, server at club. Yung picture takings na may ewan na actions. 😂 Yung HUNTING na di mawawala yung “PT TAYO LVL ANO”. 😂 Yung ITEM na laughtrip kasi hindi nawawala yung “TARGET AKO” na reklamo HAHAHAHAHA. 😂 😂 😂 Yung may mga songer sa bawat game HAHAHAHA. 😂 O kaya yung BJ sa AFK at yung DUMMY na DUMMY TALAGA KASI NAKAKALIMUTAN MAG READY O KAYA MAG LP HAHAHAHAHA. 😂 So many memories and I would really love to see them again. I’d love to make more memories with that game again hahaha kung may pagkakataon lang. So aasa pa rin akong babalik yun kahit wala na talaga hahaha..

Meh. Sobrang haba na HAHAHAHA

RIP iDATE XD Thanks for the memories and experience HAHAHAHAHA. -Panda Kor

😂😃😄😁😌😔😞😣😢

Meh

19, bad, unworthy, disgrace, disappointment, copy paste negative adjectives and most known as.. HAYOP. Atleast that's how my mom describes me. So I'd stick with that. I am someone who is best described as a panda :3 Lazy, happy-go-crazy, lazy, eats a lot, sleeps a lot, lazy, eats a lot. Unproductive. College dropout. Nope. Not ashamed of it. Hey, it was my fault and I have to face it. Why the hell would I be ashamed of it? It's part of me. All the bad things that I've done, I know I'd regret them but I'm just gonna have to accept it. I know I have to. Especially the consequences. I am facing them now actually but I'm proud. It shapes me who I really am and who I would really be. If people can't accept that, I'd still be me. I'd rather be true to myself and others than be fake as today's politicians with their fake definition with a sad story and inspiring lies that people fall for. No. I am me and there's no one else I'd rather be.

I suck. That makes me awesome. :P